Darkness consumed...without me...

''…..And while the bloody darkness consumed my poured eyes, of my time mysteriously the hours evaporated in melancholia forever… elusive pieces of an dream existence just hiding from me with wickedness between the sweet dance of the sadest shadows as if them on my dreams only find the mortal finitude of death... and suddenly the smiles were just locked in a tiny crack in the past time; leaving my soul devoid of some low relief.. there’s today in the only small bit of sky that shelters my icy world a huge scar that will remain eternally unpolluted even when blood has been dispelled on me.. Oh sensitive parts of me are dying while I miss you drowned in the silence, and perhaps my broken wings are now only a satirical illusion of a wandering and nocturnal orphan creature... and after of sail aimlessly over a thousand miles between so many sterile footsteps in this cold limbo, I discovered a big hole in my chest without beats… so lifeless, made by the immensity of the emptyness while with silent despair subject my soul but even if I leave with the unstoppable traveler wind to another inhabited corner of the world under my eternal night; my desolate and dead heart will remain even here .... without me...

Well, if there's something omnipresent in human existence that is the emptyness, there are existential and emotional voids in every life, even though some, despite being very old remain asleep or even masked still there.... for some people the psychological and particularly emotional life is governed by desperate attempts to fill these voids, but it is always more profitable to turn fertile the emptyness; yes the emptyness can be so fertile....''
C.Q.

Prozac Nation...

“I'm the girl who is lost in space, the girl who is disappearing always, forever fading away and receding farther and farther into the background. Just like the Cheshire cat, someday I will suddenly leave, but the artificial warmth of my smile, that phony, clownish curve, the kind you see on miserably sad people and villains in Disney movies, will remain behind as an ironic remnant. I am the girl you see in the photograph from some party someplace or some picnic in the park, the one who is in fact soon to be gone. When you look at the picture again, I want to assure you, I will no longer be there. I will be erased from history, like a traitor in the Soviet Union. Because with every day that goes by, I feel myself becoming more and more invisible...”
― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation

Love is a parallax....

Arrows that lacerate the sky, while knowing
the secret of their ecstasy's in going;
    some day, moving, one will drop,
and, dropping, die, to trace a wound that heals
only to reopen as flesh congeals:
    cycling phoenix never stops.

So we could rave on, darling, you and I,
until the stars tick out a lullaby
    about each cosmic pro and con;
nothing changes, for all the blazing of
our drastic jargon, but clock hands that move
    implacably from twelve to one.

Then jet the blue tent topple, stars rain down,
and god or void appall us till we drown
    in our own tears: today we start
to pay the piper with each breath, yet love
knows not of death nor calculus above
    the simple sum of heart plus heart.

''Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its sorrows, but only empties today of its strength.''

Am I going insane? My blood is boiling inside of my veins. An evil feeling attacks my body's shaking, there's no turning back.

Just like the clouds
My eyes will do the same, if you walk away
Everyday, it'll rain.....

''Sometimes you put walls up not to keep people out, but to see who cares enough to break them down''.

''If this is what he wants, and it's what she wants,
then why is there so much pain"?

''Life is a dark chain of events.'' F.N.